When nice things pops into my life and make a change, I'm happy!! and as long as these things are there , my happiness grows, until it reaches levels where it is in accompany with fear and the scare of loosing that feeling, aaaaah contradictions ,,,,, my problem is that fear is not a feeling in the background, I'm terrified as much as I'm happy, always under pressure, this night I tried crying that pressure out, didn't help!!
I believe me being happy and the fear of loosing it goes hand in hand, take it or leave it. At the end, I'm buying it, It's not easy for me to be happy !!